Pure Goodness

Mother's Day has the potential of being a really difficult day.
Silly, I know, because I have the loveliest mother and I have the most amazing kids.
I can fully and completely celebrate Mother's Day, but in the past it has been a harder day for me.
Expectation and disappointment are waiting to manifest, looking for an opportunity to spoil the joy of just living and receiving love. I could feel the old, ugly feelings coming on last night as I thought about this celebratory day coming up again.
They were so real and so horrible so I pushed back and fought them off in the night just deciding to pursue a fun day and to make the best of it.
I hate even admitting that I'm so selfish that I have allowed this day to be so hard in the past.  But I am weak and He is strong.
And together we are letting Jesus be bigger inside of me.

And it was the best.
Church was great and the kids and I met at the park for a picnic lunch packed by Nicole and a game of bocce ball.

We had so much fun and laughed and laughed over that game.
Then we came home and put together flower pots and had a BBQ outside with Oma and Opa and the whole crowd.
The orchard is in FULL BLOOM!!
And the lilacs are in fragrant blossom.

These three kids are a huge gift from God and I just want to love them really, really well.
Throw expectations to the wind and receive their kindnesses which are really overwhelming.
In the past it's been such a torrent of emotions - lots having to do with the separation and my own insecurities and sadness.

But I want to begin to live more fully.
Releasing stupid expectations and allowing God to show me His goodness in new ways.
Looking for ways to love more and to stop thinking about how my needs are or are not being met and how well I perform at making Mom's day special.
She's just so easy to please and it's all about being together.
Showing honour and blessing the God in our midst who gave us this gift of family.

Tante Hilda carrying Sweet Pea around.
Elsie just loving all of us so very, very well.
Patrice working away in the kitchen.
Daniel barbequing the meat.
Nicole decorating the cake she made for me with flowers.

Dad walking through the orchard and braving the noisy crowd.
Mom wanting to be near us and laughing easily…

Guests added for joy and celebration,

Lana making people feel special with genuine interest and love.
Olivier enjoying Moose and being his easygoing self.
Becca coming late and sharing in the hugs and visits.