The Filing Cabinet

I've been doing a bit of digging around in the filing cabinet...
finding old files and folders and pulling one big package of history together for each of the kids.
Kinda feeling raw and achy as I do it because there's just reams of history
Days and days and days of documented and undocumented family life.
Moments with the kids, Christmas letters telling stories of the year gone by,
calendars reminding me of the day that first tooth poked through, visits from Grandma, first steps and first days of school.

School papers, pictures and report cards.
Mother's Day cards, memoirs and stickers letting me know all those important milestones

Statistics - little numbers and weights and measures that culminate in a small being entering my life after hibernating in my body for nine months.
A little being that has forever changed me and filled my life with so much good and so much vision, and of course, some pain.

I just came upon this one very scrappy piece of paper with "fall '89?" written at the top.
I don't want to lose this raw, sweet little memoir.

A new mother's heart....

"The intense pleasure I take in this little boy the Lord has entrusted into our care.
I love to sit and watch his movements, expressions and beautiful smile and sparkling eyes.
I love to have him sit relaxed on my lap with his soft little hands on my arms
or his fingers entwined with mine.
Even though I have only one,
I can take some refuge in the fact that I am able to enjoy him so much
and spend uninterrupted times with him.

It's like it magnifies the love i have for him and enjoyment he brings me.

I often sit gazing at him with awe and great delight...
What a wonderful miracle that God has granted me
 the privilege to raise up a son.
My greatest desire and prayer for him is that he grows up to love God more than anything."

He still has sparkling eyes and a beautiful smile.  He's still gentle and now is is also wise.